How-Good-My-Intern-Is

I don't want to sound like an ungrateful brat, but the barrage of comments (which, rather surprisingly included a few compliments as well) the first post received has put me under immense pressure. So don't blame me for the delay in putting up the second post, blame yourself! - I was just trying to live up to expectations :P

As I write this, I am relishing my first office 'bunk'. The endless water-polo games in the swimming pool (was an awesome experience, more about that later) and the continuously running split-AC's have claimed their first victim, and my tonsils are under siege. In this state, I can't think of a more suitable topic than the simple and traditional "how-good-my-intern-is" post. (After they have officially rejected me for the PPO, I will start such a tirade against Microsoft's tyranny that even Bill Gates, sitting in Redmond, won't escape a spine-tingling shudder). [Clarification: A few readers interpreted the previous sentence as meaning that our hopes have already been squashed. I assure you that's not the case, but I also assure you that it very soon will be]

Q - Briefly list the salient features which make your intern totally 'awesome' (Pun intended :P). [5 marks]
A - My intern is good because:

a. The guest house provided by Microsoft, (for free of course) is grand. My room has a split AC (which my tonsils absolutely hate), refrigerator (which my tonsils hate with even more fervour), cable TV (With some steamy entra channels, good for my **** ), attached bath (with a tub, highly useful for Mandela, totally useless for most of us), (magically reappearing) bottles of Sprite and Coke, (magically reappearing) packets of various Lays flavors and a (magically disappearing) Wi-fi internet connection.

b. Free room service - we don't have to make our beds (good for Mandela again)

c. Free Bed-tea and Breakfast (we are getting used to it, and that's bad for our wives in the future)

c. Snooker, Foosball, TT and Carrom table in the lobby. (Bad for other interns, getting continuously raped by me in Foosball does nothing for their morale).

d. The icing on the cake - brace yourselves, because you are bound to have trouble believing this - we are sharing our flats with chicks!

[Disclaimer: The author recognizes the fact that every other chick in the world pales in comparison to Chhavi Kapoor, and hence he shall not be liable to charges of excessive flirting/cheating/sleeping around. The author also expects comments on the lines of "How sweet of you..", "You are the best boyfriend in the world" etc. from the aforesaid person as an indirect consequence of stating this fact publicly].

e. Avenger. No, they are not providing us with cruiser bikes. Or, maybe they are - the chain of thought goes something like this:

I've already told you about the free breakfast, but did I mention free lunch, free snacks and free dinner? (they are rather plain with items like butter chicken, chicken roganjosh and chicken masala :P).
But wait, I surely must have mentioned the free cabs we get for pick-up and drop? I didn't? How very evil of me.
And since I am getting so forgetful these days, I guess telling you about the pool parties we get would've skipped my mind. (I really am dying to write a post about water-polo, the only game which can give cricket a run for it's money).

In a nutshell, big daddy MS gives us pocket money, but doesn't let us spend it ;). Now, with most of you being IITians, and almost as intelligent as me, do I need to elaborate where will that Avenger come from?

With this mandatory topic out of the way, I can concentrate on the more juicy stuff the next time around (read Mandela ;)). Stay tuned, adios!